On Becoming – Part 1 of 2


Breathtaking beauty in the heart of the Rocky Mountains – in Canmore, AB
Photo taken by the author

“The greatest thing about tomorrow is, I will be better than I am today. And that’s how I look at my life. I will be a better golfer, I will be a better person, I will be a better father, I will be a better husband, I will be a better friend. That’s the beauty of tomorrow.”
– Tiger Woods

Becoming is what we are all after. To become a better person, son or daughter, friend, husband or wife, father or mother – a family member. It could also mean to become a better worker, more skilled at our craft, more excellent in our hobbies, and more graceful with our free time. The search of life is just that: a search. Nothing more and nothing less. It’s really one big search over the course of a number of decades, which defines our lifetime, with lots and lots of other searches in between. In other words, it is a lifelong search in discovering and really understanding who we actually are – our individual selves. Once we’ve discovered that, it becomes about having the courage to live that out in the public forum of who we truly are.

Of course this doesn’t come naturally or easily for anyone who has ever walked the earth. It’s a process, after all. Like all great searches, and any search for that matter, it takes time and it gets unveiled over a sequence of time, in many different ways. This is easier to write, much less live out, let me tell you. Becoming who you are doesn’t take place in the blink of an eye or the click of a finger, even though we would all wish to have our own personal genie, with a lot more than three wishes to be granted. Instead, it takes place in layers. As one layer is removed, or unearthed, we gain a greater, deeper, and more insightful understanding of who we are; thus, becoming more of, well, you. The goal of this process is to be as complete of you as you can possibly be during your lifetime.

“Every day I become a better person. Not for anyone, but for myself.”
– Author unknown

The 2016 Summer Olympic Games in Rio has come and gone. The 100-yard dash is without a doubt one of the most premier events to watch as the winner who crosses the finish line first is declared “the fastest man on earth.” The champion holds this distinct title for four years until the next Olympic Games comes around. For those who recall this highly anticipated event, Usain Bolt, who runs as fast as a lightning bolt, became the bearer of this prestigious gold medal title three times in a row, which is a first in Olympic history in this event.  Over the past 12 years Bolt became all he could be as a sprinter and rose to the upper echelon in his area of expertise. This is one such example of a person becoming and reaching all of who they were (in this case, athletics.) Perhaps you could be the next example in becoming all of who you can be.

Learning From a Quilt


The beginning of the autumn season in Calgary’s exquisite Bowness Park
Photo taken by the author during a recent rollerblade

“Our lives are like quilts – bits and pieces, joy and sorrow, stitched with love.”
– Author unknown

Life in general, and our lives in particular, is a process of being put back together again. Things have been lost in our life I’m sure you’re acutely aware of. Yet, despite this loss there is a fierce determination within each of us that wants all of it – all of you – back. Think of your life as a quilt of patterns, and through the various ways your life has come to be, some of those squares have been lost or have fallen off the once interwoven patchwork. The arrangement and assortment of each multi-layered textile was originally hand-sewn by someone who knew what they were doing when they made you. Sure, parts of the fabric have been misarranged or mishandled, but is not restoration a process any master craftsman would be committed to for each of their own?

Now, understand the patterns of your life are coming back to form one elegant quilt again. Each one of those exquisite and colourful patterns represent the uniqueness of who you are and what you have to offer (that no one else can, by the way.) Just as no one person is the same, so also no one quilt is identical to another. Essentially, a quilt can be likened to one’s own fingerprints. They are commonly used as a security practice in identifying an individual’s identify; thus, representing one of the key ways of determining a person is who they say they are.  A person’s fingerprint is a unique identifier of their personhood. Likewise, the unique tapestry of patterns on a quilt shows that no two quilts are the same; rather, each array of design is entirely different.

“Remember, people will see your quilts long after you are gone.”
– Author unknown

Here’s the point: everyone encounters setbacks and difficulties from time to time. There is no escaping this; yet, it does not have the final say. As Winston Churchill wisely once said: “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” So I urge you to have courage through each tough situation you face. Doing so is one of the ways in putting the pieces back together again – becoming whole. Wholeness to me is freedom. It’s one and the same. The key here is finding and discovering areas of your life that are freeing for you, what you do well, and what you are gifted at. A clue to one’s wholeness, or freedom, are the strengths one has been given. We all have them. They are those things we do very well, perhaps even better, than other’s around us. Our strengths are those tangible qualities that come to us and out of us naturally and effortlessly. Our strengths are what form our own extraordinary quilt.

The Art of Communicating Well


Opening tee shot at Lynx Ridge Golf Course; Calgary, AB;
Photo taken by the author

“The art of communication is the language of leadership.” – James Humes

Here is a situation we have probably all encountered: a person you’re conversing with has boundless energy and enthusiasm, and like a thoroughbred racehorse, their message charges forth out of the gates and they are able to cover immense territory in a timeless fashion. However, their words seem to travel at the speed of light, making it much too fast for the human brain to understand, much less, comprehend. It feels as if the brain is experiencing “information overload”, in its highest form.

This approach to communicating can be hard to listen to and understand. In my experience, I have found that it simply is not effective in most settings, whether at work, socially, or otherwise. This is so because what was said often has to be repeated, further explained, and is unclear to the listener.

This brings us to the point of this piece: When speaking, is your goal quantity and efficiency or quality and effectiveness?

If it’s the first one, then you’ll probably reach a new record for the amount of words spoken (quantity) in a two-minute timeframe (efficiency), but the clearness of your message may be hampered. You’ll observe this by noticing people will ask you to repeat the words you just spoke, or question’s will be looming in an effort to sort out what was actually meant, or you may see a glazed look on other’s faces as you could tell the info went in one ear and out the other, like a whirlwind. All in all, this approach doesn’t lend itself to being considerate of the other person, whether it’s one-on-one or in a group setting.  A tip here would be to breathe a couple times, slow down the pace of one’s speech, with emphasis on the words being clearly articulated and enunciated.

“Write to be understood, speak to be heard, read to grow.”  – Lawrence Clark Powell

If, on the other hand, your intent is the second part, your words will be clearly understood with no question’s arising (quality) and this style of approach will be greatly received and appreciated (effective). It is this approach, aiming for both quality and effectiveness, that I am suggesting is the best communication method. As has been said before, it’s often not what is said but how one says it that matters most which leaves a graceful and lasting impression on those to whom you are communicating with. In other words, your message will be welcomed by other’s; thus, creating a win-win scenario for everyone involved. When you encounter someone who talks in this manner, don’t you just want to keep listening to them, no matter how boring the topic of discussion may be?

Essentially, everyone wants to be heard for this is the reason we talk in the first place. Even in small talk, such as the mundane talks about the unpredictable local weather, our voice longs to be heard and noticed. Which of these two approaches will you choose when you next communicate?

Processing the Idea of Process


Photo taken by the author
Entrance to Pinebrook Golf & Country Club

“In the process
In the waiting
You’re making melodies over me
And your presence
is the promise
For I am a pilgrim on a journey”

– “Shepherd”, Bethel Music

I like what leadership expert, John Maxwell, has to say about process. In his book, “The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership”, his third law is devoted to what he calls, “The Law of Process.” As he writes, “Leadership develops daily, not in a day.” It’s the idea that any type of progress occurs over a long, gradual, and steady process in a person’s life. Think of someone whom you regard as being successful. When you chart their success backwards, you realize the little steps that person made each day, to the type of person you see in them today.

Let’s face it: I’m a millennial – part of Gen Y. What this means is, at times, I can be allergic to The Law of Process, as we seem to want things instantly. I believe that by my generation cultivating this timeless virtue that prior generation’s have modelled and lived, one of process or being steadfast towards something, we will be making a step in the right direction towards implementing this into our lives.

I love this song, as quoted above, that Amanda Cook sings. The other day, I woke up with this song in my head and I knew it was my song for the day. I’m a words-kind-of-guy, so I’ll write some words about the words of this word-ful song.

“In the process” – Ok, I get it, it’s about process. That is, everything about life, and to do with life, from our deepest longing’s to those areas we would prefer not to go.

“In the waiting” – In the process room in the house of our life, there is apparently a waiting period for us all to enter and go through, as we wait for those desires on our heart to be fulfilled and to come to full fruition.

“You’re making melodies over me” – For me, this is a reminder of grace and how it unfolds throughout my life, in a variety of ways, like a perpetual waterfall. As well, God actually sings (rejoices) over me. In the language of sports, God is cheering me on, is for me, and is my #1 Coach.

“And your presence” – That’s right, God is with me, all of the time, 24/7/365. Immanuel, “God with us”, or better fitted, “God with me.”

“is the promise” – God is the only one qualified to make promises, as He can not lie. He is the one whose promises we should listen to, as He has lots and lots of them for us.

“For I am a pilgrim on a journey” – God sees me as a pilgrim (a traveler or wanderer, especially in a foreign place) travelling along one of life’s toughest and greatest journey’s, life itself.

Quest Element’s


Photo taken by the author
At the newly-renovated Bowness Park lagoon; Calgary, AB

“If you want to build a ship, don’t drum up the men to gather wood, divide the work and give orders. Instead, teach them to yearn for the vast and endless sea…”

– Antoine de Saint Exupery

In any search we encounter, I have noticed there seems to be different elements to it; three to be exact. They are stages that are staged along each stage of our journey – signposts, if you will – that are helpful in navigating our path along it. Like any great story, there is an enticing beginning, an intriguing middle, and an engaging ending.

The first element is motivation. Simply put, we need it to get going and to get started at something. What’s the spark, the trigger, or the idea to begin that thing on your mind? To start at something means we are motivated to do it in the first place. For without a sense of motivation, why bother at all? There has to be a desire to do the thing we have set out to do. Did someone inspire you to do it? Is it an inner prompting? A goal you’ve set for yourself? A long-awaited “bucket list” item? To break the word down, ‘motivation’, what is your motive for doing it?

Next, is inspiration. Once you have gained the motivation you then need the inspiration to keep going. That is, the determination, perspiration, and persistence to keep on going, throughout the process. Challenges will come and with it the need to keep plugging along. What inspires you? Is it a picture, a quote, or a belief? If so, write it out and put it in front of you so you can see it while you work away. We all need proverbial carrots out in front of us to get us to the next point, and the next one after that. Recognize this and recognize what your’s are.

“Instead of sailing off into the sunset, he hopes to sail into the next century.”

– Dave Anderson

The final element is hope. When you’re inspired by something you have a reason to keep doing what you’re doing. In other words, hope propels you forward, no matter what obstacles you encounter along the way. Hope is one of life’s greatest gifts, for it is the engine that fuels the aliveness of one’s heart. When you have hope, nothing will stand in your way. When you receive hope, take it in for all that it is – for as small as it may be, it becomes the rudder that charts your ship where it is purposed.

In summary, any decided journey that is so dared undertaken is secured by the bookends of motivation and hope, with inspiration being the glue holding it all together.


Life Strength’s


Photo taken by the author along the Ghost River, AB

“Each person’s greatest room for growth is in the areas of his or her greatest strength.” 
– Now, Discover Your Strengths

Travel is also a discovery into who you are and who you’re not. Through all the facets of travelling, you learn valuable insights about what you’re good at and what you’re not. In the before, during, and after stages of a travelling adventure, and everything in between, you come face-to-face with what your strengths are and those areas you may prefer not to do. It can be an interesting awakening into learning more about how you are wired and what parts of the travelling project experience you enjoy more than others. Maybe it’s the research process and you love finding out everything about a certain place you’ll be visiting, or it’s developing a plan for what to do and where to go, or telling all your friends (and strangers too) about your exciting upcoming trip. Or perhaps it’s taking as many pictures as you can on your trip in trying to capture as many of the amazing memories in digital form to take back home with you, or it could be you’re the spontaneous type and prefer to just “show up” and see what happens. Whatever your bent is, the fact remains that you learn the facts about those parts of you that come most naturally to you.

Becoming aware of those traits or skills that you aren’t good at gives further insight into who you are and can be quite helpful for future endeavours, travelling or not. These are life skills and awarenesses you learn about yourself and you take them with you wherever you go and in whatever you are doing. In effect, they become transferrable, as you can lean on them and learn by them in which ever environment you find yourself. The idea of learning what you’re not good at is to be able to focus more deliberately on those areas you are great at, while not getting bogged down in the few area’s that don’t come quite as naturally.

Let me explain with an example. When I was preparing for my trip to Europe a few summer’s back, I had no idea about where I would go or what route to take. Thinking about the order of the countries I wanted to see, along with all the other necessary travel arrangements (such as accommodations, travelling, food, etc), was exciting for me but also kind of stressful, as I’ve never been there before. All I knew was I wanted to see as much of Europe as I could in as short a period of time. So, I went to a travel agency and decided to go with a tour group where all the details would already be figured out. Once I chose the tour group, with the advice of my travel agent, I could then focus my attention on choosing what trip and the length of trip to go on. All this information was in the company’s tour magazine and pretty soon I selected the trip I would go on: a 5-week trip to nineteen European countries. Knowing that the travel details were in place was a great assurance to me, and once I had that settled, I could use the rest of my time to excitedly prepare for this trip of a lifetime.

Know Thyself Through Travelling


View from Lake Louise Ski Resort
(photo taken by the author on an iPhone 5s)

“The greatest explorer on this earth never takes voyages as long as those of the man who descends to the depth of his heart.” – Julien Green

Travel is the best kind of education for learning about yourself. Let’s face it: we are all “set in our ways”, to a certain degree. Travel blows this distortion out of the water. Like a meteor falling from the sky, so is the explosion this effect has on our way of being. We are shaken to the core and are forced to deal with who we are and who we’ve become. In this state we become open to learning things about ourselves that we may not have been otherwise. The irony of course is those who know us have seen and noticed these parts in us for a long time, so this new information we have become aware of slowly comes to the surface as we reach a new level of awareness. As the saying goes, “awareness is the first stage for real change to occur.”

In the process of learning new parts about ourselves we discover new things about those around us, both abroad and at home. We also gain insightful information about the world in which we occupy a small space in it. Another way of stating this is, as we gain insights about the world and people around us, we reach new heights of understanding about ourselves, our behaviours, thought patterns, and ways of relating to people and events. This is incredibly helpful and useful because this process of learning more about ourselves, and the world around us, leads to acquiring newfound teaching’s in real-life, in real-time, and in real-life discovery.

The journey of traveling has in itself learning’s that no classroom can ever teach us, for it impacts us in the raw and tangible way that walking on distant streets and distant shores can only reveal. The terms “street smarts”, or “learning on the job” come to mind as a communicative effort to put into words what I am talking about. Through the course of travelling we gain an A+ in the study of exploration. We come back far more educated, in so many different areas, than we were heading in. If you are looking for an Ivy-League education, seek not the prestigious campuses of Stanford or Harvard; rather, seek to travel in any part of the world that is not your own and create your own campus.